Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
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