Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize