just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
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