I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
I'm okay, they said the swelling should go down in a week. But next time I'm shitwrecked, please make sure to remind me that I can't open a champagne bottle with corkscrew.
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
