when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
