Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
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