Texts From Last Night

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  (786): View more from Florida

  I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.

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  (786): I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS. http://tfl.nu/52c3
  Replies (24) Good night (1042) Bad night (4036)
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  (301): View more from Maryland

  He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.

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  (301): He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired. http://tfl.nu/1pq9
  Replies (29) Good night (5270) Bad night (1067)
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  (817): View more from Texas

  maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.

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  (817): maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me. http://tfl.nu/m7oc
  Replies (14) Good night (5049) Bad night (702)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.

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  (703): we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker. http://tfl.nu/rqvi
  Replies (8) Good night (5184) Bad night (676)
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  (416): View more from Toronto

  you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.

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  (416): you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall. http://tfl.nu/i92r
  Replies (11) Good night (4613) Bad night (1088)
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  (419): View more from Ohio

  when I sang my humps to you I meant it.

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  (419): when I sang my humps to you I meant it. http://tfl.nu/9lvg
  Replies (2) Good night (3491) Bad night (883)
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  (316): View more from Kansas

  I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.

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  (316): I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina. http://tfl.nu/8zh1
  Replies (41) Good night (6060) Bad night (1798)
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  (907): View more from Alaska

  We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller

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  (907): We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller http://tfl.nu/mw3b
  Replies (6) Good night (1348) Bad night (2305)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness

  (1-248): View more from Michigan

  don't cry, we can learn from her

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  (248): the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness (1-248): don't cry, we can learn from her http://tfl.nu/jqhb
  Replies (2) Good night (1787) Bad night (918)
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.

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  (519): It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE. http://tfl.nu/hewz
  Replies (12) Good night (1583) Bad night (2212)
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  (931): View more from Tennessee

  nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.

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  (931): nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot. http://tfl.nu/k46y
  Replies (5) Good night (1270) Bad night (563)
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  (517): View more from Michigan

  When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!

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  (517): When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?! http://tfl.nu/3qvz
  Replies (0) Good night (564) Bad night (347)
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween

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  (508): Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween http://tfl.nu/vg53
  Replies (6) Good night (579) Bad night (315)
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  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.

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  (401): Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry. http://tfl.nu/awxp
  Replies (1) Good night (395) Bad night (736)
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  (956): View more from Texas

  Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.

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  (956): Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair. http://tfl.nu/7p18
  Replies (1) Good night (626) Bad night (438)

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