Me. At least after what I've been through.
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
