Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
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What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
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I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
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