I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
Randomize