You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
Dear sober self: your car keys are in the glove compartment, your car is outside the church. I hope you're reading this from your own bed instead of someone else's.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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