covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
My Sexting was not on an AP level
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
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