i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
No subtext here. People are naked.
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Based on my calculations, I should be blackout by approximately 11:14pm and that's when I need you to take my phone away from me. Mkay?
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
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