party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Randomize
