So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Randomize