Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
I'm really sorry I called you a "smug, arrogant, boyfriend-fucking piece of defecation". I was super drunk.
I was going to be mad, but then I remembered you don't use autocorrect and spelled everything correctly and I was kinda impressed.
Randomize