I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
Randomize
