so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
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all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
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EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
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