i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
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