But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
