we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
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