he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Randomize