My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
Randomize
