Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
Tried to buy Xanax from my boss last night. Wrong Mike.
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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