She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
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