We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
Randomize