Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
Randomize
