the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Randomize
