...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
Performed a legit marriage between 2 drunk people at last call yesterday. Becoming ordained has already paid for itself.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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