When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
I just told a squirrel he was gonna suffocate because he was eating a plastic bag. and i stared at him till he spit it out. Its official, I love squirrels more than people. they actually listen.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
