also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
Randomize
