okay pat passed out under dana's car
Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
