How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
I'm only texting you this bc god forbid circumstances change when you wake up but currently santa is asleep on top of the washer and dryer.
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
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