someone owes me an orgasm
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
Randomize
