Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize