Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
Randomize