my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize
