in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
Randomize
