Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
i would punch a child for taco bell
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
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