its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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