were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
I think I just shit out all my problems.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
Randomize