hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
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