Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
21 People Reveal The Most Embarrassing Secrets They Know About Someone
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.