I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
Randomize
