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• (516): View more from New York

  Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg

  (410): View more from Maryland

  Omg suz!! take the unibrow off

  (516): View more from New York

  No! im just getting hammered instead

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• (972): View more from Texas

  Just saw a homeless guy with a sign that said "Family abducted by aliens. Need money for ransom" and on the back of the sign it said "And it's only $.88"

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• (312): View more from Illinois

  Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex

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• (714): View more from California

  you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...

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  19 Cringe-worthy Bachelorette Party Texts

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (662): View more from Mississippi

  I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.

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• (917): View more from New York City

  you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit

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• (760): View more from California

  Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow

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• (603): View more from New Hampshire

  Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?

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• (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult

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• 

  The 23 Worst Things That Have Happened After a One Night Stand

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (518): View more from New York

  He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.

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• (206): View more from Washington

  I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?

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• (904): View more from Florida

  I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.

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• (970): View more from Colorado

  Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.

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• (913): View more from Kansas

  I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him

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• (914): View more from New York

  My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.

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