Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
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