theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
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