i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Randomize