i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
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I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
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He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
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