i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
Damn victory sex feels great
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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