dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
he told me I talked like a deaf person
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
Randomize
