the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
the room spins SO much faster in panama
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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